Dear Spike:
You’re still not crawling. Rather, you’ve found your own very... um... unique way of getting from Point A to Point B.
It sort of starts as a crawl, but then you push up on all fours, slide down onto your belly, roll over and squirm sideways, then roll a few more times before getting up into a crawling position and starting again.
“What the hell is she doing?” I asked your mother last week.
“Oh that? That’s her Lieutenant Dan crawl.”
“Lieutenant Dan?”
“Yeah, like in Forest Gump — the part after he loses his legs.”
Love,
dad